The other day, I legit chased my toddler around my street with no pants. ZERO pants. He was running all over the street and I didn’t have time to think about whether or not neighbors could see my saggy white rear end peeking out from underneath my shirt. I had a toddler to catch. If you happened to look out of your window and you live on my street… you’re welcome.
Josh: “Thanks for the good dinner, mom!”
Me: (Brightening) “Thanks Josh!”
Him: “Except I don’t like the soup. It tastes yucky and makes me feel sick.”
Loudspeaker in my head: “Thank you for riding the parenting roller coaster! We’ll be here all night!”
*dad kisses everyone good-bye on his way out the door for work*
Josh: Dad, you’re the best kisser!”
Me: …..
You might think, “Huh, it’s a salad.” And you would be partly right. But what you DON’T know is how special it is. It is a special salad because I am finishing it in peace and quiet inside a car in a parking lot while 3 littles are asleep in their car seats. As you can probably guess, this salad is extra delicious because the secret ingredient is silence.
All boys slept through the night, Mom has had a shower, there’s a chill in the morning air, eggs & bacon for breakfast and I’ve had my coffee. So much yesssss on this mid September morning!
I will call this little segment “Driving Back Late at Night with Three Little Boys”
Josh: “Mom, can you turn up the music?”
Me: “No, daddy and I would like to talk to each other.”
*3 seconds of silence*
Dave: “You didn’t say that with much conviction. I don’t think you really mean that.”
Dave: “I think what you mean is ‘Mommy and Daddy want to talk to the silence in their own heads.'”
Me: “Yep.”
People of the world, you cannot have this man. He is all mine.