The other day, I legit chased my toddler around my street with no pants. ZERO pants. He was running all over the street and I didn’t have time to think about whether or not neighbors could see my saggy white rear end peeking out from underneath my shirt. I had a toddler to catch. If you happened to look out of your window and you live on my street… you’re welcome.
Been teaching Josh the rules of the road. Now he’s piping up from the back seat “MOM! YOU GOTTA STOP!!!!!!” And “GO MOMMMMM!!!!!!” He’s also giving me his opinion on what I should do on a yellow. I AM DEBATING WITH A THREE-YEAR-OLD ON MY DECISION MAKING AT A YELLOW LIGHT. People, this sums up the entire argument for self-driving cars. Progress is a three-year-old with an tiny bit of knowledge, zero experience and a huge ego.
Awfully quiet in Dodgers stadium tonight. You could hear a pin drop. A pin that sounds like 4 home runs by JD Martinez. It feels so SO GOOD.
I have a new strategy for keeping Sam from destroying the house when I’m occupied with the baby. Ya’ll ready for this? Okay, I stick him in the same room with Joshua and play off of Joshua’s need for justice. The second Sam steps out of line, Josh tattles on him. I reward Josh’s bad tattling habit and the cycle continues ad nauseam. But at least the house is still standing. Which debunks a common theory… two wrongs DO make a right.
Don’t tell Josh, but when he and Sam fight, I secretly root for Sam because he’s SO DARN FUNNY- like pushing all of Josh’s buttons just to make him spew fire. Also, I’m really bad at not laughing.