Real Talk
The other day, I legit chased my toddler around my street with no pants. ZERO pants. He was running all over the street and I didn’t have time to think about whether or not neighbors could see my saggy white rear end peeking out from underneath my shirt. I had a toddler to catch. If you happened to look out of your window and you live on my street… you’re welcome.
Rookie Mistake
The sun was not shining,
It was too wet to play (baseball).
So we sat in the house
All that cold, cold wet day.
*just kidding, no we didn’t*
That would be a rookie mistake
With three little boys.
We will take them out
To mitigate the noise.
Reign Down the Holy Fire
Josh had a day off today and his other brothers went to preschool.
Him: “Mom!!! I can’t wait to tell Sammy about the things we did today! I can’t wait to show him the toy you got me!!”
Me: “Wellll, honey, remember how upset he was this morning that you had a day off and he still had to go to school? He may not actually appreciate hearing about your fun day. You *might* not want to talk about it much with him. That’s called ‘wisdom.’ Are you allowed? Sure. Is it best for Sammy? Probably not.”
*2 min later we pick up Sammy & TJ from preschool*
Josh to Sam: “SAMMMEEEEE!!!!! YOU SHOULD SEE THE COOL NEW TOY MOM GOT ME AND ALSO SHE MADE ME GRILLED CHEESE FOR LUNCH AND I GOT TO PLAY COMPUTER GAMES!!!!!”
Boy, you just tied yourself up to the alter and imma just step aside while Sammy reigns down his holy fire on your head and consumes the wood and the stones and the dust and the water in the trench.
Red Dye #5
We are in a manic state over here fueled by Valentines cards, candy and red dye #5. We are not ok over here. And by “we” I mean “me.” But I’ll take that over a teenager’s broken heart. I know that’s a-comin down the pipeline. Until then, I’ll just watch the chaos unfold…
Not Gonna Talk
Sam, after school: “Mom, when we get into the car, I DO NOT want to talk to you about my day.”
Well then. I’m glad he’s setting me up for realistic expectations about travel convo. I’d better dust off my knowledge of Looney Tunes and Pokémon.