Yesterday’s convo: Me: “Joshua, what was the best part of your day?” Him: “Chips.” Me: “Oh, you mean the chips you ate with your sandwich at lunch?” Him: “Yep.” Me: “But what about when you went with Pops and Q for gelato? That was really neat, right?” *silence* Him: “Chips.” –sorry James & Susan… I […]
I’m sitting outside at a froyo place. A dad and his teenage son sit behind me. Twice, the son thanks his dad for the yogurt. Twice, the dad says, “You’re welcome, son. You worked hard, you deserve it. I’m proud of you.” They talked and laughed across many subjects with their gadgets stored in their pockets.
Me: “Joshua, I would like some help upstairs in your room. Will you come upstairs with me?” Him: “No way, I don’t want to.” Gosh, I’d wish he’d learn to express himself better and develop stronger opinions.
As Joshua & I watch “Planet Earth,” he points to the screen: Me: “Oh, those are mushrooms, J.” Him: “No, it’s fungus.” Excuse me for my ignorance.
As Josh was hurling himself off the couch today, I heard him talking to himself before each jump. I listened closely and he seemed to be mumbling “Be careful” – something that Dave and I repeat on an hourly basis here. So, my toddler is self-admonishing, but continues his acts of insane physical bravado. Paging […]
Josh: “Look mom- Alaskan King crab legs are on sale!” Me: “Go get a job, son.”
Today I played the “Does my child really need to go to the doctor” game… And I lost. I mean, I won, cuz he’s not *that* sick. It’s the Kobayashi Maru of parenting.
Tonight while reading “Green Eggs and Ham” to Joshua: Me: “I am Sam.” *Josh points questioningly to the guy with the hat* Me (hesitantly): “Ah, I’m not sure what his name is Joshua. The book doesn’t say.” *Josh points again* Me: “Yeah, we don’t know his name son.” *Josh points again* Me: “Josh, it’s the […]
Dear serfs of the Kingdom of Lin: It is Just. Too. Early. SOMEONE GET ME MY COFFEE! Love, the Benevolent Despot
While I’m changing Sam at the park today a little girl (about 1.5) runs up and leans in real close: Girl: “He has a PENIS!!!!” Me (trying to disguise my amusement): “Why yes, yes he does.” Girl: “My daddy has a HUGE penis.” Me: “I’m sure he’d really appreciate that assessment.”